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Microsoft Resume Templates : I would like to see if your changes have resulted in a strong letter. In the first paragraph, you write about fmancial analysts you have met, instead of the reference to The Street Journal in your prototype.



Do the changes ring true?


After we looked over the Drinkco text together, Bill wanted to ask Gabrielle some questions.


I would like to see if your changes have resulted in a strong letter. In the first paragraph, you write about fmancial analysts you have met, instead of the reference to The Street Journal in your prototype.


It's not always possible to know what type of statement would be the strongest. As the Bible says, "We know in part and prophesize in part." Therefore, I wanted a strong statement to indicate that my interest in the firm is based on something substantial. Whether professional reputation or a comment in The Street Journal would appeal more to a particular reader is hard to know. In any event, I didn't have a specific published source to refer to for Drinkco the way I had for Dollarco.


How about in paragraph two : What were you thinking when you wrote familiarity with the consumer products industry?


In the why you should interview me" paragraph, you want to tie yourself as closely to the firm's needs as possible. Therefore, I used a construct, "consumer products," which covers both Drinkco and my experience at Cheese Products.


Gabrielle has made two good points here. First, you will seldom be certain as to what statement will be the most compelling to any given reader. Your job is to make sure that any statement you do make is a point in your favor. If you write a credible sentence and have a sound rationale behind it, you have probably helped your case. Second, try to find a reasonable construct that allows you to link your past experi- ence to your next job.


Is that why you mentioned Cheese Products before Milwaukee Power in the first part of the second paragraph?


Yes. I changed the order of the facts to put the most powerful fact first.


Let's move on to the third paragraph, "why I want to work for you." You made two changes there.


Yes, remember both the industry and the firm have changed for this letter and I wanted to make a connection to both. By citing Business News, I am showing that I've done my homework. Even better, this particular quotation ties the industry to my field of professional interest. My reference to the struggle against the industry giants was framed in terms of my interest in the firm. That statement is credible even though I couldn't say anything about Drinkco's particular role in that struggle.


Gabrielle is planning to return to the work force after a lO-year absence. That requires leaping a significant hurdle. Notice that Gabrielle plans to return to a field in which she had been professionally established - in this case, fmancial analysis. It is generally easier to clear one hurdle rather than two. So it will be easier for Gabrielle to return as a fmancial analyst than to try an entirely new profession.

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