My Dear Mr. Stafford,
From your own experience you know what it moans to your eyes to drive against the sun, particularly on these dazzling, hot days.
And you know the discomfiture caused by the reflected glare from the asphalt.
Amber-colored goggles will protect your eyes from this midsummer strain. They will save them from the often serious after-effects of wind and dust, too. They are not unsightly. They rest lightly on the nose and against the temples and they can be adjusted perfectly to the contour of your head.
Our goggles are designed expressly for the motorist. They are carried in stock in three shades of amber or will be made up according to your glass prescription, the lenses being ground to order in our own shop.
These glasses are not restricted to motor use, but are equally satisfactory for all outdoor wear where the eyes are subject to undue strain.
You owe it to your eyes to give them this protection. Here, if any place, the old adage is indeed appropriate - An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
Will you stop in the store when you are down town? Or, better yet, 'phone us to deliver or make up a pair for you. Our number is Main 1243.
Yours very truly.
How much better is the rewritten version of the same letter?
The reader has pictured immediately before him a condition which he is entirely familiar with as a motorist. And note that the letter at once takes it for granted that he does drive a motor car.
Interest is then aroused by showing that the writer fully appreciates the situation of the car driver and what will be of help to him.
The manner in which the goggles are made up is then described. The reader sees that they will be manufactured individually for him.
And in the close he is given something definite to do. The action he should take is suggested in such a way that he can easily take it.
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